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Je Joue Uma G-Spot Vibrator review, photos, comparison | An eco-friendly, body-friendly way to get off

Je Joue Uma vibrator review

The product: Je Joue Uma G-Spot Vibrator

This February, I introduced you guys to one of my favourite gadgets ever made: the Je Joue MiMi Soft. So, today (you know, before the Christmas shipping deadlines), I thought I’d show you a little bit more from the line.

Je Joue is one of my all-time favourite tech brands–when you create a motor that rumbly, you get to be classed as a tech brand rather than a toy brand–and the Uma is no less well-made or well-packaged than the rest of the line. If your partner is still grasping at straws to try and find out what to get you this holiday season, send ’em this review and tell them to get you something from Je Joue. (You’re welcome.)

Also, yes, I did just learn how to code that in for this post.

Je Joue Uma G-Spot Vibrator review

The specs

Like the Je Joue MiMi Soft that I reviewed in February, Uma is 100% waterproof, silicone, and rechargeable (via two little magnetic charging points on the end, which also serve as insanely stiff +/- controls). It’s fully submersible for and features five vibration levels and six independently-controlled patterns.

Why you want… SILICONE – non-porous and completely stable, silicone toys won’t leech chemicals into your body (or trap bacteria beneath the surface). WATERPROOF – safe to use in the bath, and easy to soap up and clean thoroughly after every use. RECHARGEABLE – no additional costs over time (basic AAA batteries are $12 for four!), and they help keep used-up batteries out of landfills.

Gently curved, the Uma measures in at 7″ long and 1.25″ at its widest, and comes in four colours: purple, light lilac, fuchsia, and the matte black pictured here. If you look at it from the end, it looks a little bit like an adorably confused sloth.

Sloth Uma

Je Joue Uma review comparison - lelo, we-vibe

I really love Je Joue’s silicone, which has a velvety matte finish and doesn’t pick up too much lint — it definitely screams luxury, and is safe to use with both water-based and natural oil-based lubricants (I recommend Sliquid Sassy and Yes Organics, respectively). But unlike some other luxury brands, you really do get what you pay for with Je Joue: their silicone is flawlessly seam-free, and their battery holds a charge well over time.

Je Joue interchageable charger

The experience

Uma comes inside of a sturdy, discreet set of boxes, and features the usual ruh-ruh-ruh-ruh-ruh Je Joue motor — which, yes, is just as strong, deep, and rumbly internally as it is externally. It’s gently curved and narrower in the centre, which never catches on the pubic bone (ouch) and gives a degree of maneuverability that I think most will appreciate. I mean, except for those who prefer extremely pinpoint g-spot pressure, though really, do those people even exist.

(I’m just kidding; those people do exist, and they should opt for the G-Kii instead.)

Je Jou Uma curve

Side view of the Je Joue Uma

The Uma is extremely lightweight despite its impressive motor (which is slightly quieter here than in the MiMi), and my only complaint is that I would have liked to see it with a Soft option: Je Joue has proven that they’re able to add a very realistic texture without dampening their vibrations, and I think the Uma could have been a must-have with that soft, bouncy finish.

Uma’s length makes it easy to use internally with either a rocking or a thrusting motion, but I’d say skip it if you want to use it externally more than, like, 20% of the time — that length makes it awkward to use close-up.

Je Joue review - Uma internal vibrator

The verdict?

When it comes to sex toys, “your mileage may vary” is a term that can’t be taken seriously enough — but things like aesthetics and quality are still irrefutable. I personally prefer Je Joue’s MiMi Soft ($95) to the Uma, but I know some of you skipped the MiMi last year because you wanted an internal/external toy. For a mix of both worlds, Uma is great, if weak.

For a discreet, rechargeable internal vibrator with a medium-intensity motor, Uma is a great toy to have on hand… but without Je Joue’s Soft finish, it’s just a nice-to-have, not a must-have. You definitely need at least one of the two, though, so choose as you will!

Availability: $109 USD at SheVibe (US) / $110 CAD at Come As You Are (Canada) / £74.99 at Lovehoney (UK) with free delivery within the country at each. Special thanks to the ever-wonderful SheVibe for sending this in for review!

Remember to buy before the end of this week for delivery by the 25th.

Je Joue packaging box gift guide

Je Joue packaging (inner box) — this is great for storing your Uma!

Je Joue MiMi Soft vs Uma

Je Joue Uma vs MiMi Soft, for dust and size comparisonJe Joue textures - Soft vs normal silicone

Je Joue Uma vs MiMi Soft – squishinessJe Joue Uma review photos

Je Joue Uma G-Spot Vibrator

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  • Halley

    You are fantastic :') Thank you so much.

  • howdoesdeedoit

    They both look so artistically built!! 'Tis a "brave new world" :)
    My recent post BRAND focus : Bourjois

    • … am I the only one who wants to break out in "a whole new world" right now? :P

      (Probably. The answer is probably yes.)

  • If you prefer a rabbit style vibe the Fifi by Je Joue is very nice and similar in shape. The rabbit ears are pretty stiff on it, though.The squishiness of the MiMi Soft would have been perfect for it.

    • I've never tried out a rabbit-style vibe, actually! I don't really like the idea of something that can only work in one position — like, what if it's too shallow for me, or not curved enough, or something?

      (I have a We-Vibe 4 that absolutely kills me; I love the idea behind it, but the placement of the arms just doesn't work for me. I always just want to shake it at the sky and yell "THAT'S NOT WHERE MY BITS ARE, WE-VIBE," which is… definitely not what you want out of a vibrator. Definitely not.) :P

  • Helena

    Your toy reviews are always so great! Need. more. vibes.

    • <3 <3 Thanks, Helena!

      (Do you have a MiMi Soft yet? Because, ugh, what a dream. I would honestly be happy just owning a MiMi and nothing else.)

  • I love a good sex toy review, lol. I have a couple of vibrators and sex toys, but they're all old and I haven't used them in years, oops! I usually used them externally.
    My recent post Review | MAC Sourpuss Technakohl Liner

  • sylirael

    Aaah! I love these reviews! ^_^

    *cough*

    ..

    *tries to look cool*

    ..
    I mean, you know, in a normal 'that's such a cool funny post way TOTALLY NOTHING CREEPY MOVING RIGHT ALONG

    ;-)

    OT: This sounds really nice! I only have a little USB lipstick size vibe that's not really practical for internal use, although perfectly serviceable for external. I have to admit, it hasn't seen any use in like… 3 or 4 years actually. I tend to exploit the wizard for most such purposes (MUST NOT MAKE TERRY PRATCHETT/WIZARD'S STAFF JOKE), but I have to admit, sometimes it's nice just to be by yourself with your body. Obviously, I can say that because I have funtimez on tap from a husband, but still, sometimes you don't want a man getting in the way, hah! I've often wondered if I should get something a little more, er, fulFILLing for such occasions…

    LOL – I was reading your reply to Melissa, and had this mental image of a guy knocking on a door that says 'theNoticeHQ', it opening, an arm emerging and hauling him in by the collar. Possibly there is a tigress growl sound as this occurs… ^_^

    My recent post Stay True to the Spirit of a Rogue with Blue and Purple Lipsticks from INGLOT… + 1 Year of Bloggy Adventures!

    • YAY! :D :D Seriously, dude, this comment makes me SO HAPPY — I always get crazy excited about posting these reviews, so getting comments is like Christmas morning every. single. time. It's good to know that someone else out there likes reading them as much as I like writing them!

      I absolutely feel you on the being alone with your body thing. For me, there is this huge aspect of self-care to sex toys — I think it's so important to take out time just for yourself and maintain a level of intimacy with your body, and there are very few better ways to do it. Plus, for those of us with pelvic pain (like me!), it's super important to use those muscles regularly even when your partner is busy! SO I'M BASICALLY JUST DOING PHYSICAL THERAPY, GUYS (cue manic grins and annoying #justified hashtags)

      PS: Omfg WIZARD'S STAFF JOKES. YES. All of the yes.

  • Pingback: Review: JeJoue Uma - Bex Talks Sex()

  • Kvacki

    OMG girl! I found your blog yesterday when I googled some swatches. Delighted by all lovely makeup looks I continued reading (I'm so impressed by the mask!). And I got even more impressed when I saw this review and discovered the "ladystuff" section. Yay! :D

    • Aww, thank you! I'm so glad you're enjoying theNotice — and it always makes me SO happy when people enjoy the ladystuff/sex features. They're some of my favourites to write and share! :)