Je Joue Uma G-Spot Vibrator review, photos, comparison | An eco-friendly, body-friendly way to get off

Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Je Joue Uma vibrator review

The product: Je Joue Uma G-Spot Vibrator

This February, I introduced you guys to one of my favourite gadgets ever made: the Je Joue MiMi Soft. So, today (you know, before the Christmas shipping deadlines), I thought I’d show you a little bit more from the line.

Je Joue is one of my all-time favourite tech brands–when you create a motor that rumbly, you get to be classed as a tech brand rather than a toy brand–and the Uma is no less well-made or well-packaged than the rest of the line. If your partner is still grasping at straws to try and find out what to get you this holiday season, send ‘em this review and tell them to get you something from Je Joue. (You’re welcome.)

Also, yes, I did just learn how to code that in for this post.

Je Joue Uma G-Spot Vibrator review

The specs

Like the Je Joue MiMi Soft that I reviewed in February, Uma is 100% waterproof, silicone, and rechargeable (via two little magnetic charging points on the end, which also serve as insanely stiff +/- controls). It’s fully submersible for and features five vibration levels and six independently-controlled patterns.

Why you want… SILICONE - non-porous and completely stable, silicone toys won’t leech chemicals into your body (or trap bacteria beneath the surface). WATERPROOF - safe to use in the bath, and easy to soap up and clean thoroughly after every use. RECHARGEABLE – no additional costs over time (basic AAA batteries are $12 for four!), and they help keep used-up batteries out of landfills.

Gently curved, the Uma measures in at 7″ long and 1.25″ at its widest, and comes in four colours: purple, light lilac, fuchsia, and the matte black pictured here. If you look at it from the end, it looks a little bit like an adorably confused sloth.

Sloth Uma

Je Joue Uma review comparison - lelo, we-vibe

I really love Je Joue’s silicone, which has a velvety matte finish and doesn’t pick up too much lint — it definitely screams luxury, and is safe to use with both water-based and natural oil-based lubricants (I recommend Sliquid Sassy and Yes Organics, respectively). But unlike some other luxury brands, you really do get what you pay for with Je Joue: their silicone is flawlessly seam-free, and their battery holds a charge well over time.

Je Joue interchageable charger

The experience

Uma comes inside of a sturdy, discreet set of boxes, and features the usual ruh-ruh-ruh-ruh-ruh Je Joue motor – which, yes, is just as strong, deep, and rumbly internally as it is externally. It’s gently curved and narrower in the centre, which never catches on the pubic bone (ouch) and gives a degree of maneuverability that I think most will appreciate. I mean, except for those who prefer extremely pinpoint g-spot pressure, though really, do those people even exist.

(I’m just kidding; those people do exist, and they should opt for the G-Kii instead.)

Je Jou Uma curve

Side view of the Je Joue Uma

The Uma is extremely lightweight despite its impressive motor (which is slightly quieter here than in the MiMi), and my only complaint is that I would have liked to see it with a Soft option: Je Joue has proven that they’re able to add a very realistic texture without dampening their vibrations, and I think the Uma could have been a must-have with that soft, bouncy finish.

Uma’s length makes it easy to use internally with either a rocking or a thrusting motion, but I’d say skip it if you want to use it externally more than, like, 20% of the time – that length makes it awkward to use close-up.

Je Joue review - Uma internal vibrator

The verdict?

When it comes to sex toys, “your mileage may vary” is a term that can’t be taken seriously enough — but things like aesthetics and quality are still irrefutable. I personally prefer Je Joue’s MiMi Soft ($95) to the Uma, but I know some of you skipped the MiMi last year because you wanted an internal/external toy. For a mix of both worlds, Uma is great, and an easy toy to buy online: there’s no secondary arm to poke you in weird places, the curve isn’t so severe as to be uncomfortable, and Je Joue’s silicone is so smooth that there are literally no seams to be felt.

For a discreet, rechargeable internal vibrator with a kickass motor, Uma is an awesome toy to have on hand… but without Je Joue’s Soft finish, it’s just a nice-to-have, not a must-have. You definitely need at least one of the two, though, so choose as you will!

Availability: $109 USD at SheVibe (US) / $110 CAD at Come As You Are (Canada) / £74.99 at Lovehoney (UK) with free delivery within the country at each. Special thanks to the ever-wonderful SheVibe for sending this in for review!

Remember to buy before the end of this week for delivery by the 25th.

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L’Occitane Mer & Mitstral review, photos: the perfect gift for him (or her!)

Friday, December 5, 2014

L'Occitane Mer & Mistral Eau de Toilette review photos

The product: L’Occitane Mer & Mistral Eau de Toilette (La Collection de Grasse)

So, it’s a pretty well-known fact that I’m obsessed with the L’Occitane La Collection de Grasse – but did you know that there’s a unisex scent in the line, too? And, as a cologne lover, I am all over it.

L'Occitane Mer & Mistral review

Behind the scent: I usually like my unisex scents a little more masculine (you know: woods, amber, pepper), and this one certainly isn’t — but it’s still a complete stunner. More department store than, say, Vanille & Narcisse, Mer et Mistral is a proper sparkling aquatic: it smells shimmery and extremely fresh, with bright citrus notes paired with pine and sea salt. 

The name “Mer et Mistral” means sea and wind — specifically, the extremely fast, turbulent winds in southern France blowing north into the Mediterranean Gulf of Lion. The mistral wind controls the climate of Grasse and plays a huge part in Provençal culture, dictating everything from how bell towers are built (open iron frameworks, so the wind can pass through) to the direction that homes face (south, with their backs to the wind).

L'Occitane Mer & Mistral photos review EdT

The notes & wear: A little [too] sharp at first spritz, Mer & Mistral features top notes of lemon and mandarin, heart notes of pine, cypress, and rosemary, and base notes of cedar, white amber, and musk.

The top notes fade pretty quickly, and 20 minutes later, the scent really settles in — it gets a lot more pine-y and less sparkling close to the skin, but retains its aquatic nature in the sillage. The herby accords really come out to play not long after, and the scent just transformsOnce you get past the run-of-the-mill opening, the rosemary makes this scent almost… aquatic-foody. Which sounds super gross, I know, but think of it more like this: lemon balm and pine, herbs in a mortar and pestle, and a cabin next to a rough sea.

L'Occitane Mer & Mistral unisex fragrance review photos

The bottle: While the scent of Mer & Mistral is wonderfully bright and complex, the bottle is even better. With a blue lacquered base, this glass bottle takes on a mesmerizing, watery look — the blue comes and goes depending on what angle you look at it from, like the sea as it’s pushed and pulled by the wind.

L'Occitane Mer & Mistral packaging review bottle

The verdict?

I like things that match. I just… do. I like the visual coherency, and I like rotating between fragrances that have a similar thread that weaves through all of them.

If you’re a lover of La Collection de Grasse, do yourself a favour this season and get your guy (or girl) a bottle of Mer & Mistral. Not only will it look beautiful on the dresser next to your collection, but L’Occitane’s in-house perfumer Karine Dubreuil will make sure the two of you smell great next to each other, too.

Availability: $75 CAD at L’Occitane boutiques and online.

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Osmia Organics Milky Rose Soap review, photos + 15% off with free shipping!

Monday, December 1, 2014

Osmia Milky Rose review packaging

The product: Osmia Organics Milky Rose Soap

…also known as the perfect gift. Forgot about a Christmas party that you need a hostess gift for? Osmia Milky Rose. Got a mom that’s crazy hard to buy for? Osmia Milky Rose! Spent the whole year working so hard that you forgot to get yourself something this holiday season? Osmia Milky Rose. 

(Or a vacation. If you have not taken a vacation all year, you should probably get yourself one of those, too. Pronto.)

Osmia Milky Rose review

The formula: Like the Oh So Soap that M shared with you last week, Milky Rose is made from a base of saponified oils/butters and buttermilk powder, which make it both super gentle and thoroughly cleansing. It leaves my skin feeling squeaky-smooth, which is kind of like squeaky-clean, except without the stripping, drying half of the equation.

I usually use Dove’s Sensitive Skin Beauty Bar, which leaves my skin feeling a little less squeaky than Milky Rose, but isn’t actually any more moisturizing. The big pull for Milky Rose, however, is that Osmia products never seem to get mushy the way drugstore bar soap does. (You know how it is; you find a great bar soap and five uses in, it’s half gooey-mush-puddle. As far as I’ve seen, Osmia’s bars are quite literally made of sterner firmer stuff than that.)

Osmia soap review - Milky Rose

The look and feel: Most natural soap bars are 3-4 oz, but Osmia’s clocks in at a hefty 5.5 oz — and a whopping 6 oz for their wavy-topped bars. They’re quite stiff, and get quite slick (not soft!) in the shower.

Milky Rose comes topped with organic rose petals and is blended with bitter orange and palmarosa essential oils, and it smells very fleetingly herb-y. Osmia says that this bar “feels like a serious splurge – luxurious, elegant, and so moisturizing,” and I have to tell you — I agree with them on all three counts.

I would, however, totally love to see Milky Rose change into a wavy-topped bar, like many of Osmia’s other soaps. They’re so pretty.

Osmia Milky Rose soap, Sunset body oil

The verdict?

Yes, yes, yes! I know that $12 ($10 today) is a lot to pay for one bar of soap, but if you want something small to “splurge” on (is $12 even a splurge??), get this soap. It feels utterly luxurious, works really well on dry skin, and makes an absolutely beautiful gift year-round.

And, in case you need any more convincing, it’s also cruelty-free, 15% off, and a great way to support a small businesses! Buying it practically makes you a saint. :P

Availability: $12 USD at Osmia Organics, but the entire site is 15% off with free shipping in the US for their holiday sale, so today it’s only $10.50! (And when you buy it, make sure you pick up Sunset, too — it’s generously perfumed with one of my favourite scents ever.)

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Osmia Organics Oh So Soap & Tea Bath review, photos | The boy reviews!

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

SONY DSC

The product: Osmia Organics Oh So Soap and Organic Tea Bath

Today on theNotice, I have a very special surprise for you, dear reader: a review by M. I really wanted to highlight a few products for eczema and psoriasis (Mathew has the latter) this winter, and as someone who hates baths–his words, not mine, though true–I thought you guys might enjoy someone else’s perspective on things for a change.

So, I hope you enjoy this post, and I hope you like the pretty pictures! (How good is that tea bath one??!)

Osmia Organics Organic Tea Bath review

The Osmia Organic Tea Bath ($45 USD)

The Organic Tea Bath comes pre-portioned in six satisfyingly large cloth tea bags with cotton drawstrings. The tea’s scent is subtle and bright; sharp spearmint notes are balanced by sweet chamomile while dry. Add hot water to reveal a strong citrus element, most likely from the orange peel. The combination is pleasing, if a touch mild. The Organic Tea Bath’s scent is without the usual synthetic sheen I have come to associate with bath products, and for this, I am grateful. [ R: Oops. That's probably because I keep giving him LUSH to try. ]

When “steeped”, the bags turn the water a surprisingly opaque chamomile yellow. (I recommend holding each tea bag under the faucet as you draw your bath for best results.) After bathing, I find that the tea leaves my skin feeling much softer and less dry than it generally would be, especially if I’m in the tub for a while — but though the tea bath is very soothing while I’m in the bath, the results don’t translate into the next day. That said, these are great for anyone who enjoys a cozy winter bath but might be too lazy to moisturize after, or anyone who takes ludicrously long baths like me but doesn’t want to dry out!

–their skin. Who doesn’t want to dry out their skin.

Osmia Organics Tea Bath review sachet photo

Osmia Organics Organic Tea Bath

Does it work? Though tea (especially herbal tea) is usually steeped at much higher temperatures than is appropriate for a bath, the organic ingredients used here–like rose, calendula, and bitter orange–are paired with tried-and-true remedies for dry skin, including epsom salt and rolled oats. Each bag is good for 1-2 soothing baths (3 is stretching it), but I found the process of drying out the large sachets to be rather difficult. Those worried about cleanliness can rest easy knowing that this tea bath left only a very fine film in the tub, which rinsed out easily after use.

Osmia Organics’ Oh So Soap ($12 USD)

Osmia Organics Oh So Soap review

Osmia’s Oh So Soap has been a wonderful surprise. The elegance of the bar’s woven top is reflected in its ingredient list, which contains only saponified organic oils and butters, African pearl salt, and buttermilk powder. This velvety soap would suit the most sensitive of the sensitive, yet it still leaves you feeling clean. It’s great both on the face and body, and is unlikely to offend anyone as it contains no fragrance or essential oils.

Overall, I found Oh So Soap to be far less drying than regular bar soap, and I really liked how gentle it was. It never left my skin feeling dry or squeaky-clean, but rather like it had been magically cleaned without any soap at all. Hands down, it is the best soap I have ever used.

Osmia Organics Oh So Soap gentle dry skin review

M’s verdict?

While neither of these products made a distinct improvement on my psoriasis, I can say that they were a pleasure to use, especially in the winter. On the whole, they were very gentle on sensitive skin, and far less stripping than other soaps and bath products I have used in the past — both in the bath and coming out of it.

The Oh So Soap in particular was especially luscious, and delightfully simple — I would definitely recommend it, especially if you have very delicate or dry skin. (It is also, as Osmia Organics so succinctly puts it, “perfect for babies, even fresh ones.”)

Availability: $12 USD-$45 USD at Osmia Organics.

Annabelle Lipsies review, swatches, photos (Holiday 2014)

Monday, November 24, 2014

Annabelle Lipsies review swatches - tinted lip balm

The product: Annabelle Lipsies Lip Balm (Holiday 2014 edition)

  ↳in Roasted Marshmallow, Yummy Gingerbread, Flirty Candy cane, Grandma’s Peppermint, Cinnamon Candy, and Hot Chocolate

So, you guys know how much I love jumbo lip pencils, right? (Right). Well — Annabelle Cosmetics has come out with a limited-edition range of six for the holiday season, and they smell amazing.

Annabelle Lipsies Holiday 2014 winter review

The formula and wear: I get 2-3 hours of comfortable, moisturizing wear out of these (more moisturizing than a Chubby Stick; less moisturizing than an eos sphere), with clear to medium coverage depending on the shade. They have a soft-shiny finish, and all five shades are quite understated.

The packaging (retractable!) and overall aesthetic makes them a lot less, uh, luxe than most jumbo pencils, but I think they’d make amazing stocking stuffers — especially for a pre-teen or teenager just getting into makeup. (Or a makeup addict who doesn’t take her stash too seriously!)

Annabelle Cinnamon Candy Lipsies review swatches

Each Lipsies balm comes adorned with a cartoon drawing of their scent!

The shades and scents

Roasted Marshmallow is clear with a bit of super-fine, glossy-looking sparkle and a fruity scent — weird, considering its name, but delicious. Yummy Gingerbread is an almost-clear peach shade, and it smells like sugared cereal in milk (or an Urban Decay Rocket Lipgloss; those things were equally gross.)

Flirty Candy Cane is a sheer milky pink with a white frost finish–which makes it look more pigmented in this swatch than it really is–and again, it smells quite fruity. It’s a more standard fruit scent than Roasted Marshmallow, and a tiny bit sweeter, but both are mouthwatering. Grandma’s Peppermint is a pretty, universal sheer pink that smells like peppermint tea rather than your standard minty lip balm, and is the glossiest of the bunch.

Cinnamon Candy is by far the highlight of the group, and smells exactly like cinnamon hearts — but without the burn. It’s a new-to-me lip product scent, with a warm-red tint that sinks in to look like a stain after 15 minutes. Finally, Hot Chocolate smells like your typical chocolate-scented drugstore product, and both it and Cinnamon Candy have good pigmentation – more than Fresh or Clinique tinted balms, and I’d recommend using a mirror to apply.

Annabelle Lipsies swatches - cinnamon, gingerbread, peppermint, chocolate, candy cane, marshmallow

Annabelle Lipsies swatches: Roasted Marshmallow, Yummy Gingerbread, Flirty Candy Cane, Grandma’s Peppermint, Cinnamon Candy, Hot Chocolate

The verdict?

These ones aren’t available online, but if you can pick them up in-store, do it!! They’re a lot of fun, and at $4.95 CAD, they’re a really good price — for yourself or as a gift.

Must-have: Cinnamon Candyespecially if you look best in warmer reds! And Grandma’s Peppermint, if you love peppermint tea — this scent is spot-on. (The shade’s really pretty, too.)

Nice-to-have: Roasted Marshmallow and Flirty Candy Cane – the shimmer in both is very fine, and both are inoffensively fruity. If colour is of no consequence to you, I say go for the marshmallow.

Skip: Yummy Gingerbread and Hot Chocolate. They’re pretty gross-smelling, to be honest.

Available at drugstores and mass retail stores across Canada while quantities last.

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