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Clinique Chubby Stick Intense: let’s talk about those names | Pre-review bonus track

Clinique Chubby Stick Intense names

I’m working on a Chubby Stick Intense review for tomorrow (finally!), but I just had to take a moment and say: seriously?! No one at Clinique could do better than these for names?

I say this as lovingly as possible, but as much as I adore Clinique, this is ridiculous:

  • 01 Curviest Caramel
  • 02 Chunkiest Chili, because that doesn’t make you think of chili that’s already been consumed
  • 03 Mightiest Maraschino » this one, I love
  • 04 Heftiest Hibiscus, seriously
  • 05 Plushest Punch » this one, too!
  • 06 Roomiest Rose
  • 07 Broadest Berry when it could have been a fitting, relatable “Boldest”
  • 08 Grandest Grape

Clinique Chubby Stick Intense review teaser

I get that Clinique wanted to use big-sounding superlatives for the Intenses, but there is no excuse for Roomiest Rose. Or, for that matter, Chunkiest Chili!

Why couldn’t we have had a Cheeriest Chili? A Revival Rose? A Heidegger Hibiscus (yes, I am joking about this one, but this gorgeous shade is practically a way of being), or the aforementioned Boldest Berry? Boldest Berry, at least, should have been a no-brainer — why on earth someone would choose “broadest” when you could go with boldest for such a gorgeous shade, I have no idea.

And for that matter, why is Oversized Orange not an Intense? It’s oversized!

Clinique Chubby Stick Intense swatches teaser

If you have better names for these, come snark it up the comments!

Which names do you love, which do you hate? Can you think of any better names than these? I (and your fellow readers) would love to hear ’em!

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